Category Archives: LOL
She Probably Didn’t
A man says to his psychiatrist, “It was terrible. I was away on business and I emailed my wife to say I’d be back a day early. I rushed home from the airport and found her in bed with my best friend. I don’t get it. How could she do this to me?” “Well,” says the psychiatrist, “She probably didn’t see the email.”
That Was Long Ago
I used to believe in reincarnation, but that
was long ago, in another life.
People Really
Sometimes when a group here is more arguing than discussing, I play at my living room desk work station place of power thing some repetitively insidious music with loud obnoxiousness and I announce, “Alright. So. We’re listening now only to House Music. Until shit gets resolved.” People really scramble then. Works every goddamned time.
That Would Explain
Oh, you’re from San Francisco?
That would explain the outfit.
Chinatown, New York
The Elusive Ladyboner
What the elusive ladyboner looks like. The way she traces her neck with such dreaminess in fingers. The feigned lack of noticing, sense of disruption and stiff dismissal from The Admired. That wistful afterwards longing look to end all longing in looks when love’s back is turned. I could gaze at this GIF for days. Everything here is good.
Fuck Tha Police
I tried one time to make café au lait by pouring soy milk into the water compartment of the coffee maker. This happened once. I never made that mistake again.
I Meant Coke
Dude I was just drinking a cock and jizz exploded all over my face! Oh dammit! I meant coke! And fizz! Screw this auto cucumber! Auto cucumber. God donut. Fuck! I give up
