All That Jazz


At Changi Airport again killing time because our flight which was supposed to leave at 7am has been massively delayed. We’re each of us in diverse states of confusion and collapse, because last night was the bridge party (very fun), we returned at midnight, packed up all our things, slept not more than two hours, woke at 330am, left the hotel at 430am, and arrived at the airport exactly on time. Then our flight was cancelled due to a volcano, and now our new flights don’t leave till 3pm.

Walking through the airport, we gazed with awe at an immense and delicately beautiful sculpture. Music on the eyes, we were mesmerized.

There were again all manner of delightful Asian kids bouncing around and being elaborately cute. It’s like they can’t help it. One little Asian girl was so precious, she hardly seemed real. “I should just snatch her up,” I said, “I mean, who would question it. Shut up and listen to your mum,” I said in a bossy voice down to my right, and mimed holding tightly the little hand of my new perfectly adorable stolen Asian child. Masia laughed.

Later at the coffee shop, I entertained the gang in an unruly fashion while they all tried to remain awake. For some reason despite total sleeplessness, I alone feel great. A little blonde porcelain doll of a child walked slowly past, holding fast to her mother’s hand. She turned slowmotion wrenchingly half around to gaze at me wide-eyed, an imploring expression upon her face. Kids often stare at me unblinking for days, I think it’s the make up, the eyebrows, the facial piercings, shoes, and outfits. The little Aryan girl stared continuously at me, transfixed. “Not gonna happen,” I said, “Too white. I only take Asian kids.” Masia stifled a giggle. “But thank you for your interest,” I added, while the white girl’s mother obliviously tugged her staring child along. Masia chortled and covered her face. Making Masia laugh is part of my job, so my morning’s work was going great.

In spelling and grammar news, the bar has been set so low, I get genuinely excited whenever someone gets “desert” and “dessert” and “lose” and “loose” right. Singapore has been really marvelous, it’s sad to already have to go. But further international adventures await us, the world is bright and beautiful and big. We’re coming through, Bali, and we’re coming for you!